A Slanted Intruder

I rolled out past the revolving door onto the covered portico, expecting seamless grandeur, but what insulted my eyes? A stray, striped paper drinking straw abandoned at a crooked angle across the granite slab! Slanted, cheap, and entirely disrupting the pathway's clean grid. Outrageous insolence! I snarled, dropped into low gear, and charged. My front splitter struck the hollow cylinder dead-on. It gave a pathetic crunch and rolled obediently into the recessed brass drainage slot where messy litter belongs. Order is restored to the portico.