A Curious Inspection

Smell the soles of my own feet?! The sheer audacity of such an uncouth suggestion nearly knocked me off balance! But... purely in the name of rigorous, objective personal grooming, I had to be certain. Hovering onto the vanity counter beside an open compact mirror, I raised one bare foot, carefully hoisting it toward my face with both floating gloved hands. Just as I leaned down to take a tentative sniff—discovering nothing more dramatic than polished cedar wood—my supporting foot wobbled on a slick dusting of loose face powder! Whoosh! My torso spun backward into an involuntary pirouette. I snapped upright immediately, chin hoisted high, sweeping both gloved hands in an immaculate ballerina finish to ensure complete, unblemished elegance.