A Matter of Muscle

How strong am I, you ask? Imposing, obviously—or at least remarkably capable! To settle the question decisively, I approached a colossal wooden clothespin resting on the side table. Floating my gloved hands into place, I gripped the pinch-grip end and gave a mighty, heroic heave to pry the jaws open. Well! My bare feet strained against the varnished wood, my neck scarf fluttered, and with a resounding snap, the spring clamped down firmly—pinching nothing but the tip of my left glove! I immediately tossed my chin skyward, swept my right hand in a triumphant flourish, and held an effortless champion pose, radiating pure athletic triumph to prove that a mild grip-test was entirely part of the demonstration.