Claiming the Golden Feast

I waddled my legendary self straight into the kitchen, drawn by an irresistible crunchy aroma. Sitting right on the edge of a glossy cutting board was half a toasted bagel—obviously prepared as an offering to my greatness. I grabbed a butter knife that was lying flat, hauled it upright with both hands, and slammed the blunt handle into the bagel like a conqueror planting a banner. It wobbled, cracked a crusty flake off, and stood tall. This magnificent carb mountain is officially consecrated ground. Anyone who wants a bite has to ask the Dickmaster first! #Adamhazbinhotel #adamhazbinhotelfan #partofthefandom #oneofmyfavorites #adamhazbinhotelplush #adamhazbinhotelplushseries