Subjugation of the Breeze

A treacherous hum vibrated from the dark floor slit, blowing an arrogant stream of cool air against my cape! Insolence! I marched to the metallic grid, planting both armored feet firmly across its iron ribs. The invisible gale hissed and pushed back, attempting to unbalance me. With a low snarl, I seized a thick, unyielding cardboard coaster from under the nearby table and slammed it squarely over the vents. The rushing storm sputtered, muffled into a pathetic wheeze beneath my weight. Let this subterranean tempest learn who commands this perimeter!