Perimeter Defense

Slipping through the gap beneath the screen door was trivial, but the outdoors demanded immediate tactical fortification. Scouting Waxwell's whereabouts requires a secure perimeter, yet your porch lacked even the most rudimentary defenses. Spotting a gloriously jagged, dried pinecone nestled by the terracotta planter, I wrestled the prickly menace across the weathered floorboards. Using a stiff twig as a wedge, I anchored it precisely at the lip of the top wooden step—an exquisite caltrop awaiting the unsuspecting foot of any trespasser. Waxwell would sneer at crude ditches, but he would respect this miniature instrument of puncture. Consider your threshold officially annexed.