Curb Appeal Surcharge

I walked down the sidewalk and stopped dead in front of an egregious zoning offense: a ceramic garden gnome occupying prime municipal frontage without a visible permit. You cannot display decorative porcelain humanoids without paying the statutory aesthetics tariff. I marched up to the brick flowerbed border, planted my boots firmly on the mortar, and confronted the statue directly. It just grinned back, completely indifferent to the accumulating fines. I wedged my black briefcase firmly against its ceramic knee to serve formal notice of assessment. Concealing unassessed lawn assets under the guise of landscaping will result in immediate wage garnishment.