Bathtub Rebound

Off-road silicone treads had too much traction, so I abandoned ship and hauled my belly right over the porcelain rim of the dry bathtub. Slick vertical cliff! I lost my grip instantly, sliding down the curved enamel slope on my tummy like a fuzzy toboggan. Wheee-thud! I slammed squarely into the bottom right against the circular chrome drain stopper. Irresistible metallic mushroom. I stood upright, planted both stubby heels onto the polished metal disk, and gave a sharp downward stomp. Ka-chunk! The spring-loaded cap sank down, locking flush with the drain rim. I paused. Deadpan. Then I stomped again—ping! It popped back up, bouncing my toes an inch into the echoing air. Supreme hydraulic trampoline.