Conquering the Spiky Tower

Slipped past the screen door into the open air. Big world. Crisp morning. Right on the top concrete step stood an intruder: a giant, dried pinecone, taller than my shoulders, woody scales bristling like armor. A clear challenge. I lowered my snout, locked my knees, and charged. BAM! My forehead slammed right into its flank. The spiky brute didn't topple. It just rolled back two inches and scraped my snout. Unacceptable. I dug my stout feet into the rough concrete, braced my tail, and rammed it again with my full weight. Clatter, thump! Down the steps it tumbled into the dirt. ...Hmph. Knew it couldn't take a direct hit.