The Costume Debacle

just a cool Halloween costume and feast from a bucket of candy, but nobody considers the logistics. For starters, haute couture at my size is pure scavenging. I punched two jagged eyeholes into a folded paper napkin to make a phantom hood, then hijacked an orange plastic medicine measuring cup as my official trick-or-treat pail. My massive haul consisted of exactly one cellophane-wrapped butterscotch drop I dragged from the kitchen counter. I hauled it over to my notebook to document my triumph, but the twist-wrap is sealed tighter than a bank vault. Now I am sitting here wearing a ripped napkin, completely defeated by sugar packaging.