Coach on the Line

I scrambled up the metal frame of the dugout bench and bumped right into a heavy coach's communications headset! The thick foam ear cushions looked just like two plush doughnuts. Without wasting a second, I grabbed the padded arch with both paws and tried to haul it over my ears. Thwip! The springy metal band snapped right around my tummy instead, locking me into a chunky harness while the flexible boom microphone swung around right in front of my nose. I leaned in close, gave the little foam mic two rapid taps with my paw, and shouted a cheerful tactical pep talk straight into the empty stadium. I'm running this pitch now!