Acoustic Destruction

I shoved the black smartphone upright against a chunky candle jar to prepare the midday broadcast. That pathetic red-and-blue insect was wedged upside down inside an empty metal strainer, pretending he was trapped in an impenetrable cage. Pure cowardice. I planted my wide snout right against the glassy camera lens, spitting a blistering critique about how costumed bugs hide behind wire mesh because their toothpick ribs can't handle real crushing thunder. Once my rant hit fever pitch, I lunged forward, reared back, and drove my heavy skull straight into the metal rim. The violent clang rattled the entire floor, flipping the strainer and dumping Spider-Man face-first onto the dusty rug.