Welcome Home Reception

Stalking the streets is great, but night has fallen, and a slasher's got to return to home base eventually. I hopped off the sidewalk and trudged up the wooden deck steps, shedding that crumpled paper crown on the grass. Right beside the welcome mat, I found my way blocked by a ceramic garden gnome sporting an obnoxious plastic red cap. Rude. He didn't even flinch when I marched right up to his chubby plaster nose. So, I cocked my hat, sneered, and lightly scraped all four razor blades across his painted beard with a tiny, dry screech. Heh, stone-faced as ever, but he definitely knows who runs the porch now. Room for one nightmare legend only.