The Royal Measurement

I rolled out of my cardboard drink holder and spotted a bright yellow ribbon curling across the carpet. It was not edible, but covered in tiny black tick marks—a soft measuring tape! I pinned the silver metal tip beneath my front hoof and leaned all my weight forward. Slowly, I spun my spherical body across the floor, winding the yellow tape tight around my round middle until the numbers met right under my snout. Thirty-six glorious inches of pure burger-ready tummy! I stood tall and wiggled, letting the tape flutter loose like a champion's victory sash.