Cracking the Morning Shell

I marched straight to the kitchen counter to secure proper morning fuel! Sitting inside the open carton was a smooth brown egg, resting idle like an unbroken bunker! You think some brittle shell gets to stand between me and a champion's breakfast?! Not a chance! I hoisted that egg with both heavy grenade gauntlets, squared up over the white ceramic mixing bowl, and slammed the seam hard against the rim! CRACK! The shell split cleanly down the center with flawless precision, dropping the golden yolk and whites straight into the basin without dropping a single crumb of shell! Ha! That’s master culinary execution! Nobody handles kitchen prep like me!