Butter Dish Slipstream

I scrambled straight off the couch onto the kitchen counter where a giant ceramic butter dish with a slick yellow dome was sitting unattended! I didn't ponder for a half-second—I charged full tilt, grabbed the chunky knob with both hands, and tried to yank it open like a treasure chest! SLIP-SLIDE! The greasy ceramic base shot forward like a curling stone, bowling right into an empty ceramic sugar bowl! CLINK-RATTLE! The sugar bowl spun around, spitting out a silver teaspoon that flipped straight up and landed balanced perfectly across my forehead while I skidded belly-down into an open wooden breadbox, cackling until the whole counter vibrated!