Prime Time Takeover

Sprinting full speed across the glass coffee table, I launched myself into an airborne elbow drop straight onto the oversized red power button of the TV remote. Click! Across the room, the television woke up with a sharp surge of electric blue light, bathing the darkened lounge in glorious cinematic glow. The recoil sent me skidding sideways into a chilled ceramic mug, but I recovered instantly with a theatrical slide, dusting off my kneepads. Who needs two functioning thumbs when you've got full-body momentum? Friday night feature presentation is officially on.