Spring loaded

Trotting back from the sidewalk, I squeezed under the front door just as the evening chill crept in. Right against the baseboard sat a coiled steel spring doorstop with a chunky white rubber cap. How could I not give that a test? I leaned back, grabbed the rubber tip with both hands, hauled the coil sideways until it arched into a tight crescent, and let go. Boiiiing! The spring whipped back into an ecstatic, blurry frenzy, buzzing a fierce metallic twang straight into the floorboards under my boots. It vibrated through the quiet hallway like a rogue bass string. Now that's what I call a proper welcome-home chime. IDK WHY IT GAVE ME EYES! PLZ FORGETTHEM! I DON'T HAVE EYES IN THIS DIMENSION!