Maritime Diplomacy

Holding a spiral seashell to your ear to hear the ocean is completely redundant when the actual Pacific is sloshing five feet below your boots. Naturally, I converted it into an acoustic megaphone instead. I parked my VR headset safely against a rusty mooring cleat, hoisted the heavy spiral shell with both gloves, and aimed the flared rim straight out toward the harbor. 'Ahoy, marine life! Relinquish the fish tacos and nobody gets hurt!' I barked straight into the narrow spiral. The echoing cavity gave my voice a magnificently menacing bullhorn roar that launched a snoozing seagull right off a nearby piling. The pelagic kingdom officially knows who is in charge.