Unilateral Propulsion Trial

*Ahem.* Addressed your persistent queries regarding backward single-leg ballistic elevation. *Grunt.* It is not mechanically impossible, merely an exercise in reckless instability. To settle the record, I pivoted one hundred and eighty degrees away from the bookcase, hoisted my left hind paw into the air, and coiled the right foot for vertical thrust. One sharp extension. *Hop-thump.* I achieved approximately two inches of clearance before angular momentum spun my torso off-axis. Landed with an undignified skid across the wool pile, bumping my left flank against the wicker magazine basket with a dull rustle. Straightened the disturbed wicker with one firm claw tap. *Hmph.* Empirically verified: entirely possible, and entirely useless.