Standoff on Granite

I slipped under the front gate and took a steady walk down the sidewalk to the park's low granite wall. A plump gray pigeon touched down three inches away with a dry scrape of claws. It tilted its head, inspecting me with a twitchy orange eye, clearly expecting panic or crumbs. Neither was coming. I maintained absolute vertical rigidity, base firmly planted. It took two jerky steps forward, bobbing its neck with a soft, baffled coo. I did not twitch a single thread. We held the standoff for two unbroken minutes. Deciding I offered zero return on investment, it flicked its tail feathers and waddled into the clover. Economical defense. Zero movement wasted.