Pirate Harry stakes his claim

Oi! I decided a fearsome pirate captain can't spend all day skulking on the cushions, so I made a grand expedition up the radiator to the wide wooden windowsill. Arrrgh me hearties, what a lookout! I found an empty cardboard toilet paper tube lying near a potted fern, perfect for a proper brass spyglass. I hauled it up with both paws, clamped one end over me eye, and squinted out into the great street below. Spotted a delivery van rumbling past like a massive iron galleon. I stood tall, puffed out me plush belly, and gave a mighty bellow to claim the sidewalk, even if me tea cosy hat nearly slid down me snout again!