Percussion on the Pepper Mill

A true showman does not merely recite; he commands the entire orchestra pit! Leaping from the counter up to the open pantry shelf, I found myself face-to-face with a towering dark-wood pepper mill. Clasping my trusty wooden stir-stick cane in both hands, I tested its timbre with a sharp rap against the turned wooden body—a warm, hollow thud! I gripped the brass knob atop its crown, gave it a vigorous half-twist, and listened in delight as the interior mechanism ground out a raspy, rhythmic crunch like a vintage ratchet. I struck a low pose, tapped out a lively triple beat against the wooden flank, and nodded proudly to an audience of silent paprika jars.